5 Quick Tips to Getting and Staying Wet During Sex: Lubrication and the Aging Vagina
Vaginal fluid mostly comes from the cells lining the walls, which act similar to sweat glands. The amount differs from one woman to the another, as well as for the same woman at different times, and ranges from very little to plentiful. Some women naturally produce more fluid than others, just as some people have oily or dry skin, or sweat more or less profusely. Regardless of any of this, nothing makes the sexual process go smoother than a wet vagina. However, due to different factors, we sometimes lose our natural lubrication. Keep reading to learn about your vagina’s lubrication at every age, some lubes on the market and the benefits of a bikini wax (it’ll make sense, I promise).
Vaginal dryness or not so wetness can be from a variety of things such as a vaginal infection, prescribed drugs, mental state, age, birth control methods, dehydration and health issues. Here’s what you can expect with every decade.
20s
Your body is at its peak, as is its lubrication, because your fertility and estrogen levels are at an all time high due to the body’s urge to reproduce. You’ll also have a super high libido for the same reason. The best part? Your vulva and vagina need little maintenance (unless you’re prone to hair bumps).
30s
Your vagina is still pretty prime for baby making with most women not experiencing too many issues with lubrication; however, you may find that if you’re on birth control that the love box isn’t getting as wet as it used to. This is usually when most women begin infrequently utilizing lube.
40+
This is where vaginal atrophy (degeneration of cells-WTF) starts with the loss of estrogen. Your pubic hair texture may become thicker or coarser because of the wiry greys starting to pop out and you may find that your natural lubrication is not as abundant. The reason? Peri-menopause, the time right before your body goes into menopause. This can also be the time we become most in tuned with our bodies and know exactly what we like.
Options
Luckily there are ways to combat losing your natural wetness with one of them being very simple. Are you hydrated? Yes, the lack of water affects all areas of your body. And as we age, we may not be able to pull off “not being a water drinker” like we did when we were young. That doesn’t mean you should start drinking a gallon of water per day like the health buffs tell you. If you have an effed up bladder like me, you won’t be able to function throughout the day because you’ll line in the bathroom. No thank you! How much is enough? It’s simple. When your urine is pretty clear. If your urine is dark yellow and has a strong urine smell, you need more water. This could be something as simple as 64 oz per day. For me it’s 77 oz per day.
LUBES…
While nothing is going to beat that natural lubrication, lubes can work to facilitate a healthy and active sex life. We are a real and clean ingredient brand so we say dump the artificial, synthetic, fragranced, harsh chemical based lubes (that could be causing you to have infections). Here are your options…
WATER-BASED
Find a natural water based lube. You will need to keep applying water based lubes, however. I personally don’t like this type of lube but it’s popular because it's not as messy. Not great for sensitive skin. Condoms: Latex and Non-latex
NATURAL OIL BASED
Natural Oil-based lubes provide a more pleasurable experience and you won’t need to keep applying. I’m not referencing the synthetic oil-based lubes that are full of harmful ingredients that can cause infection and other issues. I’m referencing base oils like olive or coconut. Although this method can be messy, if you use the right amount it can be stimulating for you causing your natural juices to mix in and VERY pleasurable for a penile partner. Just be very careful if it contains essential oils. Condoms: Yes
SILICONE BASED
It lasts longer than water-based lubricants, and although “hypoallergenic,” there is an assortment of harsh ingredients in these products that may not keep your girl happy. Condoms: Only Latex
SYNTHETIC OIL BASED
Filled with harmful ingredients that can cause irritation and infection. Condoms: Can’t be used with condoms
Consider Removing Pubic Hair
When I owned my waxing salon, I waxed 1000s of women of every age. Some claimed sex felf better with a naked pube. I’ve also heard guys say the same hence one of the reasons male pubic grooming is becoming more popular. That’s something for you to test on your own but if you have long, coarse, thick or wiry grey hairs, it may get in the way of a pleasurable experience causing you to not be as wet.
Don’t want to get rid of the bush?
That’s why I created Bush Oil. It softens the pubic hair amongst other benefits. If you decide that hair is worth keeping, you want to make sure you nourish it regularly, and trim it low for a pleasant sexual experience. (Note: Bush Oil is not a lubricant. It should only be used externally).
Tips to getting and staying WET
Make sure you’re hydrated. If everywhere else is dehydrated, you better believe your girl is.
Be present. We tend to think about other things during sex. Try to be present and mindful. Let your thoughts focus on the moment. Really feel what is happening in that moment.
Wet mantra. This sounds odd but works. Gently and mentally moan I’m so wet repeatedly in your mind while smiling (not forcing anything), focusing on a wet vagina. It also opens you up to enjoyable sensations in your vaginal canal.
If the other party is doing something unenjoyable causing you to become dry, gently guide them to flow in a way that pleases you (unless it's the pounding before the release. You know what I’m talkin’ about–ha)
Tantra meditation. You can have orgasmic experiences throughout your body and on your own. Just by breathing and rubbing your arm. Get to know your body and look into tantra and erogenous zones to spice up your sex drive.
The author. Joelle Lynn is an entrepreneur, herbalist, esthetician, master-formulator of all things natural, and the founder of Happy Girl Products.